Shanink's blog

my typical work day munchies

alright, i've mentioned before that the lighting in my office is horrible. i do work in a cave. seriously, all around me is brick. the only windows we have are not windows but glass blocks that have a wavy texture to them so you can't even see out of them but they do bring in a teeny bit of light.

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so i thought i'd make a post about my typical work day munchies. because i'm an awful, awful emotional eater...trust me, i could be a lot worse than i am. i have some self control! i've consumed my grocery shopping with nothing but healthy items anymore. i've made some resolutions that i DO plan on keeping. and i have. and if i'm still at it halfway through february...my hopes are high that it'll keep up.

from left to right: breakfast which includes my staple (which is one i need to give up, bad bad addiction. my sister would attest to that), venti nonfat latte from starbucks and a kashi TLC peanut peanut butter bar (new, i love these). mid-morning snack includes the banana. lunch is in that plastic box there which is a peanut butter and jelly on 100% whole grain bread and for a "dessert" is the organic strawberry bar (archer farms, target's off-brand) sitting next to it (YUM!). the walnuts in the plastic baggy are my mid-afternoon snack or to munch on when i'm hungry (only a hand full...good fats and tricks you into feeling full) and the orange is for my last minute, just before i leave work to go work out snack. water of course is throughout the day, i try to refill near the afternoon.

really, it's quite a bit but like i said i'm an emotional eater and this just helps curb my cravings. all healthy alternatives which makes it easer on my conscience and on my body. sometimes i'll replace the orange with grapes (which i had yesterday) or an apple. if i don't have the latte, it's water. not sure where i get the "umph" to say no to going out for lunch when asked...maybe it's b/c you can't save pb&j and i hate throwing food away plus i think about how i'm going to choose what to eat and then it's going to cost me. too many cons vs. pros.

why am i writing about this...i'm not sure. as of late i've become a little obsessed with my eating habits and trying to make the right choices to make me feel better overall. i guess writing a post about it makes me feel more aware of the choices i'm making. i can see it from a different perspective.

mmmm, good food

Near the top!

So, my class is almost over and I cannot wait! The class is in the fancy new building Bellevue built just this last year. Was hoping I'd get in to see it. This is the main area, you can see the light from the entrance doors up top. This was just halfway up the stairs. It has this fountain that runs down the whole three stories. Includes, what you can kind of see up the one flight there, these little areas for sitting. Little square area with wire chairs and I think one round coffee table. There are two of these. A really neat place to sit and read or do some homework or studying. Wish I could sit in them after class but I'm headed out to Lincoln to get to work! At the bottom is where my class is and another area with tables and chairs and couches. Along with, I think a couple, flat screens on the wall portraying Bellevue information.

Rather cool building. Nicely done. I enjoy walking up and down these four flights twice a week. Yes, there is an elevator but me being the go-getter for the extra step towards being healthier and feeling like I've accomplished something...this atmosphere makes it a worth while climb. Plus I've got my laptop bag and my 10lb. purse in which I carry my life on hand, even more of an effort.

Have I mentioned yet how much I love my iPhone! I've had it since June when they came out but now posting to Vox with photos and entry is so easy and the photos are great! I get to share not only my experience but a great visual with it. I stopped for maybe 4 seconds to take the photo and then chugged on up the rest of those stairs. And, so secretive to take. No clunky camera where everyone is wondering and watching you take photos for who knows what. I always felt awkward wanting to take a photo of something, somewhere just out of the blue while others were standing around. I'll need to get over that...

Soon, I'd like to post "a day in the life" of me. I may do that on Thursday which will include photos of all the steps throughout my day on a day when I have class. :)

bellevue stairs

speaking is not my thang.

that feeling...that you get, when you get up in front of...say around 200 people, does not go away. i guess i just need more practice. but, today i had to do it. the previous year i won an award, in advertising, so this year i had to present to this year's winner. i always come up with things to say beforehand but bail out right when i get to that microphone. on a more positive note: my dad won the big award. Ad Pro of the Year. i cannot be more happy for him to win. the presenter for his award gave a great description of my dad's career in the field. i couldn't help but feel enlightened. all that work, effort, years...just amazing and something i definitely look up to.

what am i doing now? i'm semi-working. starting a project is always my downfall. fast turnaround so i'm completely unmotivated. hoping writing a post will help push me along. on the other hand (thinking more positively) i ran 30 minutes yesterday! i met up with a friend of mine who's also getting into the regular working out thing. she runs usually so i figured she'd be a great motivator and must have worked! thanks lindsey!!! it's an accomplishment i'm rather proud of. i can't tell you how impressed i was when it was all over with. even after 25 minutes i couldn't believe i was doing it. just last friday i tried running 10. i got there but man...i was whooped. thank goodness rodney and i hung out after yesterday's run...he made me dinner :) speaking of him...i posted a better picture of my flowers below. this time they're sitting on my desk. i love, love them!

purdy flowers on my desk

my first time

Did I freak you with the header?! Ha! Not that. Dirty! My bf of only 7mo. sent flowers today!!! Never have I recieved flowers from my significant other!!! I cannot stop smiling! They smell and look so purdy! Hard to tell but I'm counting 13. Isn't that a baker's dozen? Is that what they're supposed to send when you ask for a dozen? Who cares! I got flowers from a cute boy!!! :)

Sorry the pic is dark. I work in a cave.

purdy flowers

picking my last class

yeah, i get to pick! sweet! the last class that i need to take isn't offered until the fall and i'm ready to be done. so i was offered the opportunity to pick a substitute for the class. now all i gotta do is get online and pick one. not any one class though. there are restrictions. a 300-400 level class. although, i'm sort of disappointed i can't take the one that i need to take which sounds rather interesting but i can't handle the stress of having class yet going on in the back of my head anymore. i'm ready, let's do this!

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dentist appointment tomorrow...after class...wish me luck! i'm gonna ask about straightening my teeth! whoot!
(i swear, i don't have an addiction to exclamation points!!!)

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UPDATE: I picked my class! I can't wait! I'll be done before summer, how perfect.

BA 455 - Internet Marketing

This course examines the nature, characteristics and culture of the online environment to understand, develop and implement marketing strategies and tactics for conducting effective online commerce. Emphasis is on the hardware/software tools necessary for Internet-based commerce, market segmentation identification, product development, pricing, direct marketing, global marketing, and the methodology to execute marketing strategy in a computer mediated environment.

rockin'

I am so excited I got bear to play Guitar Hero. It's so much fun but to see him play, be good and look like he's having fun is even better than me playing it. I had to get proof and here it is! Sure to put a smile on my face any day. Yeay! :)

bear and guitar hero

letting go of things i cannot control

my new "thing" to live by this year. i've been let down a lot in the past year by many people. people i love, people i trusted, people i believe in. i've been back stabbed, i've been hurt and all for making better choices in my life. all hard choices but still i'm being criticized and questioned. i'm feeling more alone every day. i wish, just wish for someone to take my side, to believe in me and to not support others who are no longer in my life. part of moving on is forgetting. and i hate forgetting b/c it makes me sad. and when i'm not being supported and no one is backing me up, i just feel like all is lost. i know these things, thoughts, stuff that's been said, is not to hurt me intentionally but i should not have to ask for support and for others to move on when it's not their life, even when it's the ones that love me and support me the most.

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so, i keep quiet. the one time i do speak up and ask for some respect out of all the changes that are going on in my life i hear it's still happening and it's a big disappointment and they take offense to it? hello? if anyone should take offense and need an apology, it's me! my patience is slipping drastically for a lot of people that i put my trust in. what do i do? do i keep dealing with it silently? how do i say something without hurting? but then they hurt me?! i am sick of people being so selfish. everyone is in their own way but this has nothing to do with them. and, it seems they're not thinking of me. there's always a "but." and there shouldn't be.

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i would like to say, on the other hand, the changes i've made have made me a happier person. whether they see it or not (mostly b/c they let me down it's hard to be happy around them) but when i'm alone or with my other half it's just bliss. i am in my own little world, nothing makes me feel bad, i won't let it and i can push everything aside.

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it's my turn to shine. and, i'm gonna be fine. i know i'll be. it'll just take some time to accept what has happened. i know this. but, it just makes me sad. makes me really sad. doing my best to not get angry. because if it's this way, it's not my fault, it's their choice to feel this way and to do or say those things. but, yeah, it needs to stop b/c i want that trust back. i want to be happy with them. it's time to be grown ups. i've apologized for my behavior, my actions. i'm moving on from this. it's out of my control and there's nothing i can do about it. i'm accepting being unaccepted.

Getting ready to meet the Johnson family!

Isn't he so cute! I was super nervous but so excited. They were awesome. From everything I heard about them they were what I expected. Had a great weekend!

Bear Putting Shoes On

what was i thinking?

oatmeal, 1/3 of a choc. cookie (with chocolate frosting, mind you) and a 20oz. sprite (didn't drink all of it)...for breakfast.

now, i'm eating ramen noodles for lunch which despite its pleasent price is super bad for you.

grocery store tonight, yup yup.

:)

what am i doing?

ha! i seem to ask myself that question everyday. but, i suppose that's a good thing. anywho. today...a good day. i got to work and i had my new (bigger) monitor set up, got a new external hard drive to carry my work files back and forth to omaha and lincoln and i got my new necklace in the mail!

thinking of Rodney

was so excited to get this necklace, to see it "in action." i'm overly happy about it, if that's possible?! there are two other kinds of personalized necklaces that this girl has. independent artist from oregon. very cool stuff! u can get here: http://www.giantjewels.com